Golf Trip, Up country NZ, part two

Thinking about our disastrous round at Taihape, I should have known what was coming, only I walked past this notice without it registering any reaction in my brain. You need gumboots to play the course !!









After the disappointing golf our Friday night road run further north, to Taumarunui, was a very sedate affair, Captain Tim, who was driving, had recently received a speeding fine and was certainly not going to risk another one. Roy had brought along with him his GPS system, which worked very well, including warning us of all static speed cameras along the way. We finally reached our destination around eight in the evening, and instantly started the celebrations with some aplomb, drinking beer as though we had been stranded in a desert for a week. I do not remember much about the rest of the evening, finally falling into bed at 0130.

Saturday morning I was really in no fit state to tackle the demanding Taumarunui Tarrangower course, the really hot conditions did not help any, but I have to admit it was a beautiful day, shame about the golf. I was test driving a new driver, but not a success, no way near as reliable as my Taylor Made R7 Quad.

Captain Tim and Roy must have been suffering a similar malaise, as their scores were also in the do not ask category.

Not having learned a thing about excessive drink and golf, its like trying to mix oil and water, we charged Gung-ho into the excellent bars and clubs in the Taumarunui township that evening. In the middle of all our revelry it was unilaterally agreed to spend some time eating curry at the local Indian restaurant. Can not remember what we had, but whatever it was it did not sit well with Captain Tim.

Sunday morning, competition day, poor old  Captain Tim had made at least four trips to the men’s locker room before teeing off. {there are pictures, but I am too squeamish to even look at them}

Needless to say none of us gained a mention at the prize giving presentation ceremony on Sunday, and amazingly I also missed the award for the worst player of the day. I think my saving grace was a birdie on the last. The prize is a shirt with a rather rude message on it, “I can’t play golf for sh**”  Which reminded me of the sheep crap round we suffered at Taihape, excellent par three or not, I am not going there again.

Just as we left the Taumarunui Golf Club, the heavens opened, and it chucked it down with bucket loads of rain for the four hour drive back to Paraparaumu. If there is anyone out there, who is not not of Maori descent and can correctly pronounce Taumarunui, please drop me a line. Personally I have reduced Paraparaumu,to just Param, and everyone knows where I am talking about.

If you would like to put your name forward for next years Kapiti Club mystery trip, please just email me, at  I don’t know why they call it a mystery trip, because we all know where we are going. We have to, otherwise no one would get there, Duh.